did you give your yiayia my number?
.... are you getting text messages in greek?
yes, loads of them. i thought my phone was possessed for a minute there. does she think this is yours?
they said it was for emergencies.
they realise i only speak english, yeah?
what's the emoji situation like?
mostly hearts, standard elderly fare. good to know some things translate to any language.
did you send hearts back?
i have not sent anything back, love. it's all in greek.
they're over there preparing the dowry and you turn a cold shoulder. for shame.
wait, seriously? isn't there a goat exchange or something first. i don't know what greeks are paying these days.
lamb exchange maybe. roasted. and you'll have to travel to peloponnese for it.
shit, this dowry thing isn't too bad.